Editor's Note: Each week, Mike "Statman" Donovan writes up obscure and fun trivia related to the Portland Timbers and Thorns FC. We call them #Statman Stumpers, presented by Dutch Bros. Think you can beat the Statman? Post your scores on social media.
With the return of the 2020 MLS regular season this Sunday against Seattle Sounders FC (7pm, FS1), #Statman asks if you can name every Timbers player across all eras of the club who has scored against our rivals to the north. Don't let the format below scare you. You don't need to know the exact match date of each goalscorer, you just need to guess the names.
Club
#Statman Stumpers | Can you name every Timbers player to ever score against Seattle?
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A preview of Timbers-Whitecaps + Apple TV's Keith Costigan | Timbers Fan Podcast
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4:54
"I think we need to up our intensity levels" | Phil Neville speaks after training
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2:12
"It's up to us as a team to stop them" | Finn Surman talks about facing Whitecaps
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5:30
"We didn't come out with the right energy" | Cole Bassett talks about loss to Colorado
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5:37
"I felt we never got started" | Phil Neville discusses loss to Rapids
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10:32
HIGHLIGHTS | Colorado Rapids vs. Portland Timbers | Feb. 28, 2026
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RECAP | Timbers lose 2-0 on the road to Colorado Rapids
